Well, let me tell you, this here zen horoscope thing, it’s somethin’ else. It’s like readin’ the tea leaves, but fancier. They say it tells ya what’s gonna happen in your day, all based on them stars and planets way up yonder. My old eyes ain’t what they used to be, but I reckon it’s worth a gander. If you want to learn more about your zodiac sign, just keep reading. I’ll do my best to explain it simple for you.
Now, I ain’t no fancy scientist, but I hear them say the stars and planets, they got a pull on us, like the moon pulls the tide. So, this zen horoscope, it tries to figure out that pull, and tell ya what kinda day you’re gonna have. Like, if you’re gonna be lucky in love, or if you best keep your money in your pocket. Maybe you’ll find a lucky penny, or maybe you’ll stub your toe. I just hope it can tell me to avoid the stubbing part. This old back can’t take any more of that.
They got all these signs, see? Like, if you was born in, say, July, you might be one of them… what’s they call ’em? Leos. That’s a lion. And they say them lions is all strong and like to be the boss. Then you have the fish and the bull. Don’t ask me what the others are. My memory is a little bad. I can barely remember what I had for breakfast.
- Leo (July 23 – August 22) – They’re like the king of the jungle, them Leos. Bold and love to be in charge. It is said that they love being the center of attention, like a rooster in a henhouse.
- I heard some folks is called… uh… Aquarius. Sounds like somethin’ you’d keep a fish in. They say them folks is different, like to do their own thing. Independent, like a cat that don’t come when it’s called. And they like to stand out. Maybe they got blue hair or somethin’. They say they are ruled by Uranus and Saturn. Whatever that means.
- Then there is a… hmm, a crab? Yeah, a crab. That’s another one. And there are so many more.
The daily horoscope can be a little bit different every day. It’s like the weather, you know? Some days are sunny and some days are rainy. Your daily prediction might change based on those stars. So I reckon, if you are a cancer, you better look at your prediction and decide what to wear! There are also free accurate readings you can find. Well, as long as someone helps you find them.
So, this zen horoscope, it’s like a little fortune tellin’. And maybe it helps ya figure things out. They even talk about your love life. Can you believe it? This love horoscope will tell you if you are going to meet the love of your life today or just have another regular day. I don’t know who needs to hear that, but there you go. I tell you what, if you ask me, that’s a little too much information. But I guess some people want to know that.
Now, some folks, they swear by this stuff. They read their daily horoscope every single day, like it’s the gospel truth. Others, they just think it’s a bunch of hogwash. I guess it depends on what you believe in. For example, I don’t believe that young people these days know how to use a rotary phone. I don’t even think they know what it is. But I do believe that you should look both ways before you cross the street. I guess this zen horoscope is the same. You believe what you want to believe.
But I’ll tell ya what, it’s kinda fun to read, even if you don’t take it too serious. It’s like readin’ the funny papers. You can always have a good laugh. And sometimes, just sometimes, it might be right on the money. Just like how I knew it was going to rain yesterday because my knee was aching. It’s like having a little secret, a little somethin’ to think about during the day.
So, if you’re curious about this zen horoscope stuff, go ahead and give it a try. It might just surprise ya. Might tell ya somethin’ you didn’t know about yourself, or somethin’ that’s gonna happen. I hope it’s not that I will be losing my glasses again. But if it happens, it happens. And if it don’t, well, that’s okay too. Just remember to take it all with a grain of salt. There is nothing better than having your own brain tell you what to do and what not to do.
Just don’t go bettin’ the farm on it, ya hear? It’s just a bit of fun, like watchin’ the clouds go by and tryin’ to see shapes in ’em. You might see a bunny, you might see a dragon. It’s all in how ya look at it. So go ahead, give it a read. If it says you’re gonna have a good day, well, that’s just dandy, ain’t it? It might just give you a little extra pep in your step. I think I’ll try it. Maybe it will say that I’ll finally win bingo night. One can only hope.
